Fornever
by silverstrings
Summary: Wanting something back that was once yours is only human. [KazukiSakura]


**Title:** Fornever  
**Pairings:** Kazuki/Sakura, MakubeX/Sakura  
**Warnings:** Vague smut, nothing too graphic.  
**Notes:** I was sort of wanting to poke at Kazuki's selfish side a little. Given the way he grew up, and the way he acted and was treated during Fuuga, it seems only natural that he's a liiiittle spoiled and used to getting what he wants. …Yeah. That's about it. I felt the need to write something Kazuki/Sakura-centric but couldn't come up with any light, fluffy ideas. Wah. This likely takes place very shortly after the I.L. arc of the manga and anime.

* * *

He looks at MakubeX and tries so hard not to resent him. The boy has had a hard life, questioning his own worth and even his own existence. His smiles are often thin and forced and he goes for days - sometimes weeks - at a time with little to no sleep nor food.

Kazuki knows MakubeX needs Sakura more than he does.

And yet he sits and stares at her, watching the way she combs her fingers through MakubeX's pale hair while his head rests in her lap... a place that was once his. He wonders if MakubeX notices the way he watches, and yet doesn't care. Sakura was one of _his_, once upon a time. The way that Juubei and Toshiki and Saizou still are and always would be. Her loyalty lay with him enough to abandon her own family for his sake, and he wonders when exactly it was that loyalty shifted to the new ruler of Lower Town.

The answer is clear enough: when Kazuki left Mugenjou after Raitei, when Juubei's own loyalty faltered, Sakura's did as well. The only difference between the siblings was that Juubei returned to the lord and master he belonged to, and Sakura had not.

MakubeX has called him there for a reason. Kazuki regards him quietly, waiting patiently as the boy opens his eyes and sits up, a thoughtful expression on his face. Eventually, he turns to look at the thread-user, smiling.

"I was wondering... hoping... if you and Shido were planning on coming back to Mugenjou now. There's still room for you here; it would be wonderful to have you."

The words are almost a slap in the face, but his calm composure does not change. He lowers his head, eyes rolling up to stare through his half-lidded lashes. "To work under you." It is not a question. Immediately, MakubeX senses his error, though looks more perplexed than anything. Kazuki finds his fingers curling slowly, tensely, against where they're rested atop his thighs. "I'm afraid I have to decline," _stay polite, don't be rude,_ "you have one of mine at your side now. Isn't that enough?"

The words sting and he knows it. MakubeX's expression goes flat, and the smile he tries to offer then is uncomfortable and forced. "I apologize, Kazuki-san."

Except that he's not _really_ sorry, and Kazuki can tell. The intense feeling of jealousy and bitterness knots his stomach to the point of feeling nauseous. He has to politely excuse himself from the control room, cut his visit short, before he says or does something he'll later regret. More so than he already has, at least.

MakubeX says nothing as he leaves, and Sakura has already started to rise to her feet, confused. "What was that about...?"

"It seems I forgot to enter something into my calculations when judging his reaction," MakubeX murmurs, turning back to his computer monitor where the security camera feed shows Kazuki's slow departure down the vast hallways leading to the control room.

"What do you mean...?" She looks caught between going to her old master and staying with her new. The boy tilts his head back to look up at her.

"I'd not entered _you_ into the calculation."

In comparison to her brother, Sakura holds no regret for her decisions to stick by MakubeX's side, but those words remind her of her original place in the world, her supposed duty in life.

She doesn't follow after him immediately. Rather, she leaves Mugenjou to go to his apartment a few blocks away instead only after a day or so to consider what to say to him. He looks surprised to see her when he opens his door to her knock, but silently steps aside to allow her in.

"This is unexpected. Please, make yourself at home. Can I get you something to drink?"

"Kazuki-sama-"

"I just put some tea on, if you'd like some. I was going to start dinner soon as well..."

"Kazuki-sama..."

"I don't cook much anymore, since it's just me, but..."

"_Kazuki-sama."_

Her tone gives him pause where he stands in the kitchen doorway, his back to her. She clutches her hands in front of herself tightly. "About yesterday..."

"...I don't want to talk about it." He looks over his shoulder. She's quite unaccustomed to him giving _her_ one of his fake smiles. He disappears into the kitchen, and Sakura follows.

"But _I_ do."

He busies himself preparing his tea, and makes a cup for her as well despite her neglecting to say whether or not she wanted any. "Fine, then talk."

Sakura's hands wring together tighter. "Yesterday, what you said to MakubeX..."

"Were you expecting me to say yes?" Kazuki turns a little, leaving the tea to steep on the kitchen counter. His eyes are a little too intense for Sakura's liking, and she shifts uncomfortably.

"Honestly, I didn't think so but I was hoping...-"

"I will _not_ degrade myself to working beneath someone who was barely even my _equal_," Kazuki snaps sharply.

Sakura lifts her head, eyes wide in shock at such a cruel comment. The face she finds herself staring into isn't _Kazuki_, but the Terrible Prince she remembers from the days of Fuuga; unsmiling, cold, bitter at the world. The sight of it makes her heart ache. Is he really so upset with her...?

Nothing competes with the surprise of him stepping closer and grabbing her, however, followed by his mouth pressing against Sakura's in a kiss so demanding that she can think of nothing to do but obediently subject. Kazuki is still her master in a way she can't deny, and this goes against nothing MakubeX has ordered her to do or not to do, and so she feels that objecting would be willful disobedience.

And it's not as though her body objects to the way he's touching her, pushing her down onto the large, soft bed in his room. His hands make short work of her clothes, and she only vaguely recalls where they land on the floor.

The desperation in his movements are what _truly_ surprises her; the frantic way he kisses her and moves his hands down her body, presses his own flush against her, wanting, _needing_ to claim her in any way he can. Sakura has always thought of Kazuki as beautiful, and she thinks no differently now with his face flushed, long hair draping about them and delightfully soft between her fingers, and the way his eyes look so sad and seem reluctant to meet hers for fear that she'll push him away and reject him more than she already has.

Once he's inside of her, she recalls a time years ago when she loved him and when nothing made her happier than to see him smile and when leaving her family behind for his sake had had been the most natural thing in the world… She had forsaken her own blood for him, and yet wouldn't leave the side of a boy she'd only known a few years. For the first time, she feels sincerely sorry for the decision she made.

His soft voice calls her name against the warm crook of her neck as they both draw to release, and her fingers clutch at his shoulders, clinging.

There is no cuddling afterwards, no sweet exchanges of words, because Sakura draws away even as he reaches for her helplessly. She cleans herself up, tries to make some sense of her mussed hair and proceeds to dress. Kazuki rolls over, puts his back to her. She is thankful, because she's not sure if she could handle seeing his eyes right now.

"…MakubeX is a good man," she tells him softly. "I do love him. Very, very much. Perhaps nothing will come of it, perhaps someday it will pass and I will find someone else, but for now this is the path I have chosen and I will not stray from it. I'm sorry for the decisions that I have made and that they hurt you, Kazuki-sama, but I do not regret them."

He says nothing, and so she leaves as quietly as she came to return to Mugenjou. The next time they see each other, she knows he will smile and be polite and kind and act as though nothing ever happened, but he will hate and love her for what she has done for the rest of his life. It is part of the decisions Sakura has made, and she hopes she, he, _both_ of them, can find a way to cope with it.

On the kitchen counter, both abandoned cups of tea have gone cold.

_owari._


End file.
